Life Coaching Tips in Preparing Teens for Adulthood
As parents, our role is to take care of our children until the day comes when they themselves will finally face the harsh reality of living in the real world. While our kids graduate from high school knowing how to read and write, other critical life skills are not necessarily taught in the classroom setting.
Before our teen leaves home, we must see to it that they are prepared to live independently while also making a positive difference in the world. Read through this blog to find out what life coaching tips Aaron has prepared for your teen to learn before living on their own.
Five Sets of Life Skills Your Teen Needs
As stated by Harvard's Center on the Developing Child, It's less about grades and extracurricular activities and more about a fundamental set of skills that help people handle life's inevitable problems.
Although, it may be a given fact that many of the skills that we need to master in order to be successful and happy throughout our lives are only acquired through time and experience. They don't always need to be rushed or forced. Studies show that teen brains aren't fully matured yet, and many specialized attacks called life skills will emerge as they mature into young adults.
Thus as parents, we can only assist our children in the learning process by providing opportunities for them to practice necessary life skills they need to equip for their upcoming battle —- adulthood.
Harvard has simplified the vast categories into five core life skills for your teenager.
Planning: The capacity to develop and carry out concrete goals and plans
Focus: the ability to focus on what is important at any particular time.
Self-control: Ability to manage how we react to not only our emotions but also to stressful events.
Awareness: Not only do we notice the people and situations around us, but we also grasp where we most likely fit in.
Flexibility: The ability to adjust to changing circumstances.
Here are some
Planning
Teenagers already have a lot on their plate during this time. Whilst they may require some assistance with planning ahead, they need to learn to do it on their own.
Sit down with your teen and go over his or her planned schedule. Avoid micromanaging their time. Instead, discuss how he/she can design a timetable that works best for him/her. While one teen may want to finish schoolwork directly after school, another may choose to take an hour off before returning to work. You could just set some ground rules for them to know their limitations.
When they have difficult projects, such as research or design projects, sit down with them and discuss how they intend to complete them. Allow them to explore their creativity and come up with their own ideas.
Always involve them in planning family activities like vacations, house renovations, or other tasks. See to it that they will feel that they have a say in things (even if you don't always agree with them).
Focus
The rapid advancement in technology especially the internet has had contrasting effects on people of all ages. It has become a significant part of our lives. It has even reached the point of having the influence to share our future endeavours.
Social media can aid in the healthy development of teenagers, yet it can also pose issues. According to psychological studies, it is crucial to focus on how teens use social media and how they use it for the better. As parents, we can be their role models.
Discuss with your children how and why you use social media and the internet — how it can interfere with daily living (and homework), and assist them in devising solutions to deal with the distraction. You can eat meals and spend time as a family without using a screen. You can also encourage non-screen activities for them to explore their interests like sports, cooking, sewing, sketching, painting, or gardening.
Self-control
Self-control is one of the most crucial qualities you can teach your child. It is a vital skill for survival. Adults who can control their emotions and responses are more likely to have effective career and personal relationships.
Contrary to popular belief, gaining self-control often emerges from confrontation. So, the next time you find yourself arguing with your teen, remember that it's an excellent teaching opportunity. You may help your teen gain self-control by doing the following:
Discuss feelings and coping mechanisms, such as taking a deep breath, getting away from the situation, screaming into a pillow, and so on. After everyone has cooled down, you can have a debriefing about what could your adolescent have done differently. Discuss how their actions affect others and why it's vital to be conscious of this (an activity that also develops awareness).
Awareness
Teens will become hyper-aware and curious largely of their immediate surroundings. As parents, we can encourage the practice of mindfulness. Being self-aware necessitates a great deal of self-reflection, which is difficult to do when we are continuously busy or filling our lives with noise.
You can think of taking nature walks with your teens to promote full awareness in the present moment and urge us to notice your thoughts and feelings. Through this activity, you may realize a lot of things — observe how your body feels, what noises you hear, how comfortable your surroundings are, or what smells are there. Encourage your teen to notice and describe any wandering thoughts they have, and then return to the present moment. Then, you could take advantage of this moment to discuss their favourite activities or lessons and how they might apply them to a prospective career in the future.
When parents discuss the meaning and purpose of life with their children, they get curious about themselves and want to grow. You could also talk about the qualities they appreciate or admire in others.
Flexibility
Again, life is simply a battlefield. It has been designed to throw you off your game at any given circumstance and teens must be prepared to attack.
By being rational and optimistic – moving forward even when things appear to be going wrong. You can assist your teen in becoming flexible in developing positive thinking habits and coping mechanisms.
Take these scenarios as an example:
When your teens are frustrated, you can help them regain perspective by concentrating on truths and reality.
You can also teach them that a bad circumstance in one part of their life does not imply that everything will go awry. For example, if your teen has low exam scores, you can explain that it would not affect their hobbies or relationships with friends.
The Reality of Life
There is always the possibility that your teen will fail if you allow them to do something. Resist the urge to dive right in and rescue them. Whilst it is critical to have your child's back (both now and for the rest of their lives), teens must sometimes fail to learn. Allow them to work it out on their own before offering assistance. Who knows? They might bounce back even higher than before.